As I assumed....

Well, given all that this weekend provided, I still had to go and get my blood drawn today. I went at 9 am and was in and out. I went home to wait for the dreaded phone call. My hubby convinced me to tear down the tree and put decorations away. While doing so, the phone rang. I answered the phone and I could tell by the tone in her voice that the answer would be negative. All I remember is , " Hi, this is so and so from such and such and I wish I was calling with better news, but___________." At that point I started to sob and couldn't catch my breath. Hearing negative is like a punch in the guts....Contrary to what my hubby would say, I handled it better. I just went in to our bedroom got in to bed and cried my eyes out. Actually to the point where I couldn't breathe and felt like I was going to puke ( I haven't cried that hard in about a year). My hubby didn't really know what to do and we didn't really talk for about an hour after the news broke. I called my mom, his mom, and texted my close friends. Some have been very supportive, while others seemed like I interrupted their day. To boot, I then found out that I girl I used to work with was pregnant today...keep kicking me while I'm down people. I actually surprised myself with all the things I didn't do today.....So I guess now we have to decide what we want to do next....I know they say ,"god doesn't give you more than you can handle...but I just wish he didn't trust me as much."